Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize