ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize