I've blown a few things in my day
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.