i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
