is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize