Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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