THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize