So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
