Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
