The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
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