Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
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So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
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Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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