The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Randomize
