you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
