Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home