No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
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I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
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Can you repeat that, but with context?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again