There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
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Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
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He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.