she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize