Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
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