I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Randomize
