Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
