Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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