Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
