This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
