The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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