you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.