fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
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