I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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