Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
These tits shall not be calmed
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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