Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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