During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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