I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
