worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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