What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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