i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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