So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
