Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
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