the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
