I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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