I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
