im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize