i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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