problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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