Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
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he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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