yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
