Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
