I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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