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• (212): View more from New York

  I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv

  (1-405): View more from Oklahoma

  we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina

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• (361): View more from Texas

  After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood

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• (607): View more from New York

  Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.

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• (818): View more from California

  I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  You high??

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