David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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