Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I just found puke in my bra..
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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