No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
