I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
