Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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