just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
